As children get older, parents face the inevitable demands to buy them the latest must-haves – and a mobile phone is high among them.
But, with moves to restrict smartphone use in schools, an increasing number of parents are viewing ‘feature phones’ as a best-of-both-worlds solution – meaning they can stay in touch with their child, while safe in the knowledge they do not have access to harmful online content.
These basic phones – with no access to social media – are not dissimilar to the mobiles many parents would have had themselves when growing up.
Now, research from Vodafone reveals that while 83% of parents want their child to have a mobile so they can contact them, two thirds (67%) would rather they had a feature phone before getting a smartphone.
Mother-of-three Emma Robertson, who is a co-founder of Digital Awareness UK, an organisation that works with Vodafone to promote safer use of technology, has comprised a list of six questions parents should ask themselves before they buy their child a mobile phone.
Read on below for the phone security expert’s top pieces of advice regarding the tricky issue of purchasing a phone for your child.
Mother-of-three Emma Robertson, who is a co-founder of Digital Awareness UK, an organisation that works with Vodafone to promote safer use of technology, has comprised a list of six questions parents should ask themselves before they buy their child a mobile phone (File image)
Can my child self-regulate?
Sharing the first question parents should be asking themselves, Emma noted that it is important to consider how much time your child will be spending on their phone.
Emma said: ‘When it comes to self-regulation, consider whether your child can find a healthy balance – will they be able to enjoy their smartphone while also maintaining the core aspects of life that are essential for their wellbeing?.
‘A good starting point is to observe how they manage other devices in the home, such as laptops, games consoles and tablets, paying special attention to how they are impacting activities like their sleep hygiene, socialising with friends or family and keeping active.
‘If you feel your child might struggle to use a smartphone in a healthy and balanced way, firstly, you are not alone, and it could suggest that they’re not quite ready for a phone and need support developing their tech habits.
‘This might include setting clear limits, creating a routine, monitoring their use for a trial period, leading by example with good tech habits and encouraging plenty of self-reflection.
‘From our conversations with parents, many say that introducing a feature phone [such as a Nokia with pay-as-you-go-credit] is a good way to ease your child into managing a smartphone responsibly.
‘However, it’s worth bearing in mind that feature phones can be quite limited in terms of what they can do and aren’t always the first choice for children, so it’s important to weigh those factors in your decision.’
Should my child enter into a device agreement?
If you are considering purchasing a mobile for your child – the next question you should be asking yourself is whether or not an agreement around how much the device is used would be helpful.
Emma said: ‘Conditions might be around following age restrictions on the apps or games they’re playing, and how they will communicate with you if something happens that upsets them.
‘Parents often tell us that avoiding language such as ”don’t” or ”no” creates a more positive experience with boundary setting and we’ve found this is the case too.
‘There are so many different things that could be covered but ensuring your child is aware of the boundaries and restrictions is important – and usually, children respond well to that structure.
‘A lot of families sit down and create these boundaries together so they’ll sit around the table and say ”okay, we’re happy for you to have this smartphone but let’s have a conversation about what we’re all comfortable with and how we can ensure it is a positive addition to your life.”
‘So, the question of whether your child would benefit from having clear boundaries is a good one to ask yourself. And why not make it a whole family effort and create safe and healthy boundaries together for everyone.’
The phone security expert also says that it is essential to establish why you are giving your child a phone in the first place (File image)
What is the reason for giving my child a phone?
The phone security expert also says that it is essential to establish why you are giving your child a phone in the first place.
Emma said: ‘From our conversations, a popular reason why parents get their children a phone is because it gives them peace of mind knowing that their child can contact them if they ever need them.
‘Children will often say, it’s about wanting to keep up with their peers and be part of the social interactions that happen online, which gives them a sense of belonging.
‘It’s important to help your child understand that having a smartphone is a big responsibility with a lot to consider when it comes to wellbeing and safety.
‘And, there may be other things to consider – for example your child may accidentally drop it, leave it somewhere or lose it.
‘Even though a lot of first phones are hand-me-downs, that doesn’t mean it’s not a safety or security risk – your child may be exposed to inappropriate content or be distracted by the device while walking to school.
‘If your child is young and you want them to have a device to help ensure they’re safe walking to and from school, a feature phone can be a great choice as it allows you to stay connected without a big investment or exposing them to unnecessary risk.
Is peer pressure influencing my decision to get my child a smartphone?
While peer pressure is a natural thing for any child to experience at school, if it is behind one of the reasons that your child wants to get a smartphone, then you should not ignore that trigger.
Emma said: ‘Peer pressure often has a strong influence on both children and parents when choosing a phone.
‘For most children it’s a mixture of peer pressure and curiosity – these are probably the two factors influencing them the most.
‘Fears around social exclusion is a sentiment that many of us can relate to, but it also presents an important opportunity to help your child understand that peer pressure alone should not be the driving force behind making big decisions.
‘Talking to your child about managing device-related peer pressure can be a sensitive but important conversation that should be approached with empathy and understanding.’
How can I connect with other parents?
Emma’s penultimate tip for how best to manage the situation of buying your child their first phone centred on talking to other parents.
She said this could be useful if you do not have other children but are looking to set clear boundaries for your child.
Emma said: ‘It’s always encouraging to see groups of parents coming together to discuss concerns about phones and share experiences.
‘The current movements promoting a smartphone-free childhood can create space for encouragement, support and solidarity.
‘Many of the parents we speak to now are either considering feature phones to get their children started or opting to wait until their children are older and they feel more comfortable with the idea of them having a phone.
‘If parents (especially the parents of your child’s close friends) all chose to delay smartphones or introduce feature phones for their children, it would create a situation where children (and their parents) feel less peer pressure.
‘Not everyone will be in agreement, of course, but taking a stand collectively and finding others who share your values can be empowering for everyone.’
How can I make sure my child uses their phone responsibly?
Lastly, Emma addressed the all-important question of how a parent can make sure their child is responsible if given a mobile phone (File image)
Lastly, Emma addressed the all-important question of how a parent can make sure their child is responsible if given a mobile phone.
Emma said: ‘Supporting your child in navigating the risks and opportunities of being online is a critical and ongoing process that evolves as they get older.
‘Many parents may not feel that they are aware of all the potential challenges their child might face online.
‘Supporting their children to use messaging apps, social media and gaming platforms safely and responsibly can be a challenge for parents.
‘There’s so much for children to navigate, and whilst there are many benefits for children in the online world, sadly many will encounter inappropriate content, pieces of misinformation or need help when it comes to switching off and finding balance.
‘What’s important is that parents stay informed and actively support their child as they make mistakes, overcome any challenges and learn how to manage digital life in a way that is positive for their wellbeing and safety.’