A TikTok influencer has laid bare her cyberstalking nightmare, which eerily echoes the haunting new Netflix docuseries ‘Can I Tell You a Secret?’
The show follows three women targeted by the UK worst’s cyber stalker Matthew Hardy, who left his victims so scared they slept with weapons.
Hardy would contact them claiming to have information about their loved ones or lives before unleashing an unrelenting, years-long harassment campaign via fake social media accounts and phone numbers. They lost friendships, job opportunities and ended up trusting no one.
This shattering reality of cyber stalking is something influencer Brielle Asero, 21, has come to know all too well.
She told DailyMail.com her nightmare began after her a total stranger got in touch off the back of a viral TikTok about her 9-5 working day. He quickly became ‘hyper-fixated’ and decided to look her up in the White Pages.
TikTok influencer Brielle Asero has laid bare her cyberstalking nightmare, which eerily echoes the haunting new Netflix docuseries ‘Can I Tell You a Secret?’
Asero has been subjected to a terrifying four month cyber stalking ordeal which began after her stalker became aware of her through a viral TikTok
The stalker began by asking her out on a date but the messages quickly turned threatening
Asero says he first asked her out on a date, before sending a barrage of messages.
The threats quickly escalated, with him threatening to ‘chop’ up her friends and even sending a graphic image appearing to show a butchered woman’s body.
‘You know I know where you work right?’ reads one menacing comment. ‘I can come meet you on your lunch break. It will be a public place, what’s the worst that can happen?’
The stalker taunted her about going to the police and even threatened to kill himself if she didn’t reply.
One particularly aggressive message to Asero’s friend states he will ‘personally chop you up bit by bit and mail them to your parents you worthless b****.’
Asero now fears daily for her safety, as her stalker has begun trying to use her YouTube videos to track down her location.
‘He knows my parents’ phone numbers, he knows my address, he knows where I worked. He knows all my siblings, he knows my ex-boyfriend,’ she said in a TikTok explaining the situation.
The TikToker explained she felt compelled to make a video about the situation in case something happened, saying ‘at least it would be documented’.
Asero says she has reported the problem to the police and FBI but they have struggled to track down her digitally adept stalker
Law enforcement have so far been unable to track down her stalker because he uses burner phones and encrypted emails, Asero said.
‘He still comments and harasses me to this day and it’s been four months, commenting my addresses and places of work,’ she told DailyMail.com.
‘I think that law enforcement hasn’t been taking it seriously enough and it’s been proven with the thousands of other girls I’ve seen with the same exact story.
‘I’m just trying to spread awareness but at the same time the guy is still out there and I would like to work with someone to help me find him.’
Despite now carrying self-defense items every where she goes, Asero remains defiant about continuing to post and refuses to let her stalker’s actions dictate her life.
But she admits it has come at the cost of some of her relationships.
‘It has caused a lot of tension between family members and friends who want to hang out with me, but are paranoid about the stalker targeting them, as he has to my best friends,’ Asero said.
‘I’ve not stopped posting on social media and for awareness purposes. I do not believe I should have to stop my life or stop posting on the platform I have built just because someone wants to harass me.’
Asero claims her complaints to TikTok have fallen on deaf ears and even resulting in her getting banned from the platform
Asero’s stalker found her by looking up her number in the White Pages
He became aggressive and warned her not to ignore him in a series of increasingly menacing texts
Asero claims her complaints to TikTok have fallen on deaf ears and even resulting in her getting banned from the platform.
‘TikTok has never responded to my inquiries and reports about this, I posted TikTok videos about the harassment and I was banned multiple times for no reason,’ she said.
‘Meanwhile I have threats in my comment sections everyday. I have worked so hard for my platform and I had received no help from TikTok.’
She is among those who do not believe social media companies are doing enough to tackle online harassment.
Asero’s case perfectly encapsulates many of the dynamic challenges faced in tackling cyber stalking.
A DOJ report found that police are rarely able to prioritize or allot substantial resources to cyberstalking, and ‘many agents and officers lack training in how to investigate the crime or help victims’.
A major obstacle in securing prosecutions is that it can be tricky to tie digital evidence to the suspect, especially if they are tech-savvy and adept at hiding their tracks.
And as social media and other forms of technology have developed, the law has failed to keep pace.
The DOJ noted in its own report that, ‘the legal system is underprepared to handle cyberstalking cases’.
Definitions of what constitutes cyber stalking vary from state to state with penalties often only incurred for repeat offenders or if victims genuinely fears for their safety.
Cyber stalking was made a federal offence in 2005 under the Violence Against Women Act.
The legislation makes it illegal to use ‘any interactive computer service or electronic communication service’ to intentionally place a person ‘in reasonable fear’ of death or serious bodily injury, or that causes or could cause ‘substantial emotional distress.’
However, federal prosecutions have remained proportionally low in the decades since it was introduced.
The number of prosecutions has grown steadily since 2014 hitting a a peak of 80 cases in 2019. But between 2010 and 2020, there were just 412 cases were filed.
Among the successful prosecutions was a case brought against cyber stalkers, was that of an Iowa man sentenced to 10 years in prison for stalking his ex for two years.
Michael Shawn McGuire, 58, of Cresco, went as far as putting ‘sexually explicit’ yard signs with his victim’s image on them and sending flyers to her job and church.
He made five fake Facebook accounts featuring her name and lewd photos and the stalking escalated from virtual to physical.
During his sentencing hearing, Judge C.J. Williams said McGuire engaged in ‘a form of mental torture’ and a ‘form of public terrorism in a way.’
Matthew Hardy – Britain’s worst cyber stalker – enacted a tirade of stalking and harassment online that spanned over a decade
While women are twice as likely to be victims of stalking than men, the issue affects all demographics
However, last year a Supreme Court ruling actually made it more difficult to prosecute stalking cases by handing down an opinion on a case which stated that victims must not only prove they fear for their safety – but that their perpetrators are aware of the impact of their behavior.
‘Given that the Court has imposed a higher standard for state intervention against stalking than is used to lawfully justify the use of deadly force, it would seem that stalking victims are better off relying on lethal self-defense than law enforcement for protection,’ Dr Mary Anne Franks, an anti-cyberbullying campaigner and University of Miami law professor said.
Stalking advocate Lenora Claire was let down so badly by law enforcement that she was forced to hatch a plan to catch her stalker, who went from pursuing her online to hatching a terrifying plot to kidnap her.
She became the object of schizophrenic Justin Massler’s obsession after he saw her in a magazine. Massler, who changed his name to Cloud Starchaser, has multiple arrests for stalking celebrities, including Ivanka Trump.
Claire caught him after he sent her a letter threatening to kidnap her from a Los Angeles Comic Con event he knew she would be working. When he arrived, security were able to detain him and hand him over to police.
Massler was convicted of maximum felony stalking charges, which is extremely rare. However, he served just two days of a four year sentence and within three days was back making YouTube videos about Claire.
‘Everyone likes to focus on the lack of laws but the reality is the laws we currently have aren’t even being enforced’ Claire explained.
Leonora Claire ended up catching her own stalker following a lack of action by police and is now an advocate for stalking victims
Claire has been called the ‘Erin Brokovich of stalking’ . She believes existing laws are not being used effectively enough after her stalker served just two days in jail despite hatching a plot to kidnap her
‘They aren’t being enforced because law enforcement rarely has the proper training to adequately do risk assessment and to know the difference between harassment and more dangerous stalking.
‘Stalking is a widely under reported crime so the statistics we have despite being in the millions still don’t accurately reflect how common it is.’
Almost three million Americans are victims of cyber stalking every year, according to DOJ figures.
In many states, stalking is deemed a ‘wobbler’, a crime that can be deemed both misdemeanor and felony and since evidence can be hard to obtain it is often prosecuted as a misdemeanor.
If an offender is in another state, there is no extradition on misdemeanors.
‘It’s incredibly rare for anyone to intervene on a federal level so in the case of cyber stalking we see this play out this way time and time again,’ Claire added.
Unlike Asero and Claire, most of those victims will know their cyber stalkers, according to the Stalking Prevention, Awareness and Resource Center.
This is something Ms Oregon International Amber Rosenberry has firsthand experience of.
The beauty queen was forced to change her job, her routine and her hobbies after a man she used to date began an aggressive campaign of terror after she tried to cut off contact.
‘He set up numerous fake dating profiles contacted and belittled me, targeting specific insecurities my stalker knew about me. I filed a police report, which caused an exponential escalation. Horrific text messages came in from fake phone numbers,’ Rosenberry explained.
Ms Oregon International Amber Rosenberry was the victim of a terrifying cyber stalking ordeal at the hands of a man she used to date
The pageant queen is now campaigning for the law around cyberstalking to be modernized in Oregon
‘He sent flowers to my house with ominous messages.. He created fake dating profiles in my name using my photos, and interacted with people as if he was me.
He went to all the places I would normally be, and got angry when I wasn’t at any of them. He slashed the tires of my company’s vehicles.’
Her stalker began combing through her social media page and contacted her friends, trying to break up marriages and get people fired.
‘He sent untraceable messages to their personal phones telling them ‘This is Amber’s fault; she knows how to make this stop’,’ Rosenberry added.
It took three years to get to trial, during which time her stalker was offered a sweetheart plea deal of a guilty plea to a misdemeanor with time served.
Following a media backlash, the case went to trial and he was eventually convicted of a felony although released on probation for time served.
Her nightmare has prompted her to campaign for more laws to protect victims of cyberstalking in her home state.
‘Oregon needs to include cyberstalking methods in the list of ‘contacts’ that qualify as stalking. GPS tracking, hacking accounts, and creating fake profiles did not exist in the early 1990s when the law was written,’ Rosenberry explained.
‘It also needs to acknowledge that some stalking behaviors are more than just a misdemeanor and require an immediate response to protect the victim.’
Almost three million Americans are victims of cyberstalking every year, according to DOJ figures
But the problem is not just limited to Oregon. Many state laws also only provide protection if the victim fears for their personal safety or if the offence happens more than once.
‘I am concerned that we don’t recognize how many people are stalked every year,’ Rosenberry added.
‘Stalking affects every region, social-economic status, race, age, and gender. As a society, we dismiss the victim’s fear.
‘The victim is told to move, change jobs, change their phone number, and change their name Moving isn’t feasible for most people. Moving is a huge disruption for anyone with kids. It’s frustrating that this is the first response to a victim who reports stalking.’
She advised anyone going through a similar situation to keep speaking out.
Rosenberry added: ‘It does not matter if people don’t listen or believe you at first. If you know you’re afraid, keep telling the people around you that you’re afraid. Do not be silent.’