By the time my daughter told me about her future mother-in-law’s latest cruel stunt, she had at least stopped crying.
Although I could have wept myself as I listened to the story of what Jackie had done to my darling girl.
Kim and her fiancé, Luke, had gone to a family birthday party at Jackie’s house. First, after Kim politely declined a piece of cake, Jackie asked her: ‘Do you think you might have an eating disorder?’
If only that had been the worst of it. An hour later Luke’s uncle, who arrived late, walked straight up to Kim and loudly exclaimed: ‘It makes a change to see you with some clothes on!’
It transpired Jackie had been screenshotting bikini pictures of Kim from her private Instagram account. Jackie was then forwarding them to family members with the caption: ‘Look at what Kim’s not been wearing today’.
Kim, 27, learnt all this from Luke’s younger brother’s girlfriend – someone else who Jackie gives a rough ride – after she whisked her out into the garden to explain.
Kim was devastated. She gets on with Luke’s other female relatives, so was shocked they’d been included in her humiliation.
Hurt and embarrassed, she ran upstairs crying and locked herself in the bathroom, where she sent Luke a text saying: ‘Take me home NOW.’
Jackie is your archetypal difficult mother-in-law; a walking cliché who has made a hobby out of belittling my daughter since she got with her son four years ago, writes Linda (file image)
To his credit, he got her straight out of there. But did he challenge his mother and make her apologise? No!
Kim relayed how galling it was to hear Jackie holding court in the dining room as they left, behaving as though nothing had happened.
I wanted to go straight round and knock that woman’s block off. But Kim has ordered me and her father not to get involved – it would just make things worse, she says, and we have to respect her wishes.
Jackie is your archetypal difficult mother-in-law; a walking cliché who has made a hobby out of belittling and embarrassing my daughter ever since she got together with her son four years ago.
What started off as coldness has evolved into open acts of warfare, even though Kim, a veterinary nurse, has only ever been polite and kind to her.
When Kim and Luke told her they were engaged, she couldn’t hide her dismay.
‘She looked like she was chewing a wasp when she faked a smile,’ Kim told me.
Jackie often walks into the house that Kim and Luke share and looks down pointedly at the carpet. ‘Is your vacuum cleaner broken, Kim?’ she will ask – note how she leaves Luke out of it – while brushing imaginary dirt off her chair before sitting down.
The woman turns 60 this week. Yet she often behaves more like a playground mean girl than the soon-to-be-retired office manager she is.
‘That’s an interesting haircut,’ she exclaimed after Kim got a fringe. Then added: ‘Don’t worry, it’ll grow out.’
Family get-togethers are always nerve-racking. If Kim wears something figure hugging, Jackie looks her up and down disapprovingly.
If Kim turns up in something more casual, she’ll say: ‘Are you having an off-day?’
It’s a strange dynamic, when another woman gets thrown into your orbit all because your daughter fell in love with her son. Thankfully, my husband and I only have to suffer her company once a year for Christmas drinks.
What’s most frustrating is that Kim – who is beautiful, kind-hearted and sharp-witted – could do so much better than Luke. Don’t get me wrong, he’s sweet, kind and great company. He’s doing well as a section manager at the supermarket chain where he works.
While he wouldn’t win any beauty parades, he does make my daughter laugh. He’d also make a good dad if they have children. And Kim loves him, so for her sake it’s important that I make him feel welcome.
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Where he lets himself down – and, more importantly Kim – is the way he allows Jackie to get away with such appalling behaviour. Luke’s a wimp, a 29-year-old mummy’s boy, who’d rather tread on hot coals than upset his mother.
So he claims not to hear comments like the one she made about Kim’s appetite. Or says that his mum has always been spiky, so it’s nothing personal to Kim, and that her insults simply don’t register with him any more.
But Kim has described scenes when Jackie has criticised a meal she’s just cooked, while sitting next to Luke, and he’s said nothing.
Honestly, I don’t get what warped psychology makes Jackie think her behaviour towards Kim is OK. Maybe she’s jealous that this gorgeous young woman now has her son’s heart, especially given that she’s a widow.
Recently, she even tried bringing me into her twisted power games. ‘What would your mother say if she saw the state of this kitchen?’ she asked Kim once, after turning up unannounced to find dirty pots in their sink.
Even before the upset over those bikini pictures, Jackie had suggested I must surely object to her posting similar pictures from other holidays.
I hope she brings that up at Christmas, when I’ll tell her that if my bikini pictures looked half as good as Kim’s, I’d display them on a billboard.
When I’ve asked Kim why she doesn’t stand up to her, she shrugs her shoulders, and says she doesn’t want a row. But ultimately, it could be Luke who pays the price. They haven’t set a wedding date, and Kim may yet decide his mother is too much trouble.
If that day ever does come, as upsetting as a broken engagement would be and as much as I’d miss Luke, I’ll take great delight in telling Jackie exactly what I think of her.
Linda Webb is a pseudonym. All names have been changed.