Wayne Holdsworth has never been the same since the terrible moment he discovered his son hanged in his room just hours after taking his own life.
Wayne, a father-of-two and CEO of the Frankston & District Basketball Association, had never suspected his 17-year-old son Mac was struggling.
Even in the hours before he took his own life, the teenager had been upbeat, joking with his sister and even making plans for the following morning.
Wayne now knows feels Mac had felt he was about to be rid of the cruel sextortion scam that had made his final stages of his life a hellish trauma.
Mac had been tricked into sending an intimate photo to a person he thought was a teenage girl on Instagram.
Pictured is the last photo taken of Mac Holdsworth, 17, and his loving father Wayne
Instead, the photo was delivered to a 45-year-old pervert from NSW who then used it to extort Mac, threatening to send the photo to the boy’s friends and family.
The man demanded $500, which Mac quickly sent. Then came a demand for another $500.
The man told Mac his family would ‘hate him’ and that he would want to take his own life if the photo was ever shared online.
Mac admitted the situation to his dad and police, and when they made efforts to track down the perpetrator, he hacked into Mac’s Instagram account and sent the intimate photo to his inner circle.
Mac tried to laugh off the incident with friends, but inside it had left him hurt and humiliated.
Police were able to charge the man over the sextortion scam, with Mac asked to prepare a victim impact statement to read in court.
The teenager took his own life before he could confront his abuser.
‘He, in my opinion, never got over that,’ Mr Holdsworth told Daily Mail .
‘The suicide letter that he wrote indicated that.’
During a search of his iPad and computer, Wayne found a letter from Mac apologising for being a burden to his family.
After his son’s death, Mr Holdsworth made the journey from Victoria to Liverpool Court in western Sydney in the hopes he could read his own victim impact statement to the man who ruined Mac’s life.
However, he was blocked from reading the statement after the man pleaded guilty.
‘He was there behind the glass. I went up there thinking, “I’m gonna eyeball this guy and I’m gonna deliver the impact statement”.
‘Well, I was shaking and I’m a pretty strong sort of bloke and the senior detective put his arm on me and he said “It’s ok, Wayne don’t worry”.
‘But the prosecution and the defence got together and they didn’t allow me to read the victim impact statement. They’d done a deal where he would get, if he pleaded guilty, six months in jail.
‘I wasn’t angry, I was just disappointed in the system that had allowed that. I spoke to both the defence and the prosecution and I gave them a piece of my mind.
‘I was really disappointed. I asked the defence lawyer, has he shown any remorse? And she said “no”.
‘When the magistrate asked whether he would plead guilty or not, he said “Yes, I plead guilty, but I’m the victim”.
‘So that rattled me a bit.
‘He got six months and because he’d been in custody for three months, he’s out now and I have no shadow of a doubt that he is doing exactly the same thing again.’
Wayne Holdsworth has made it his life’s mission to teach others about suicide prevention
Mac took his own life exactly 100 days after his mother Renee passed away following an 18-month battle with multiple sclerosis.
‘I’d ask him “Are you ok?’ ‘How are you going?” and he’d say “I’m fine Dad” and change the subject,’ Wayne recalled.
‘His upbeat attitude, particularly toward the end, indicated that he got through everything, that he was ok, and it was the exact opposite.’
While the online extortion was the major tipping point in his son’s suicide, Mr Holdsworth believes another incident that harmed Mac’s mental health was an apprenticeship with a local electrician.
Initially, Mr Holdsworth thought the electrician was a good bloke but noticed that when he picked up Mac from the work site, his son was uncharacteristically quiet on the drive home.
One afternoon, Mac burst into tears as he described how he had been called a ‘useless c***’ after he put tools back in the wrong place.
Wayne quickly realised he was being bullied and confronted the man.
‘We had to pull him out of there and Mac’s life was turned upside down a little bit because he had planned on being a sparky,’ Wayne said.
‘He used to walk around in his gear with the boots and the fluro jet vest around to his mate’s place and this had been taken from him really quickly.
‘I called [the electrician] and I said “Is this true?” and he said “Yeah, it is, I’ve got to do better”. So there was no denying what had gone on and Mac was hurt by that.’
Mac was able to brush himself off and found a job in retail before he started as an apprentice carpenter at a different worksite, where he thrived.
Mac is being remembered as a much-loved friend and son who loved sport and being a tradie
His death came as a shock to so many, with 700 people attending his funeral at Connect Christian Church in Frankston, southeast Melbourne.
Mr Holdsworth was understandably devastated at his son’s death so soon after the loss of his wife, and saw three options: to take his own life, to live without purpose or dedicate his life to suicide prevention.
Since Mac’s death on October 23, Mr Holdsworth has spent almost every day speaking with parents and young people about mental health and the rising rate of suicide.
He has started a non-for-profit called Smacktalk where he shares his story with groups and teaches them how to spot the signs that someone is struggling.
After presenting to 1,000 people in six weeks, 12 people came forward for help.
‘Part of the grieving apparently is finding something that makes you feel better. And people talk about riding a bike, hiking, or doing something physical,’ he said.
‘Well this is mine… I have an absolute obligation to help other families by sharing my story and presenting some proven guidance that can hopefully help.’
If you or anyone you know needs support, you can contact Lifeline 131 114, or Beyond Blue on 1300 224 636.