Minnesota school shooter Robin Westman made a final plea to their family and friends in a suicide note penned before slaughtering two children at mass.
Westman, 23, posted the note to a now-deleted YouTube page just hours before shooting through stained glass windows at children sitting on the pews inside Annunciation Catholic School’s church on Wednesday morning.
Two children aged eight and 10 were killed in the attack and at least 17 other victims – 14 children and three adults – were injured before Westman turned the gun on herself, according to authorities.
The shooter explained in a note the reason for carrying out the attack in Minneapolis, while apologizing to her family and friends – and offered one final request.
‘Pray for the victims and their families,’ Westman concluded her rambling note, despite having a rifle magazine labeled ‘For the children, hahahahahahaha.’
Earlier in the letter, Westman wrote about struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts for years – which were apparently aggravated by the belief she was dying of cancer from vaping.
‘I was corrupted by this world and have learned to hate what life is,’ the shooter wrote after telling her parents that they have not failed her and she feels she ‘was raised to be a good person.’
‘There is too much to accept, too many things to put with just to live,’ Westman continued. ‘I’m tired of the pain this world gives out.’
The shooter then goes on to say that they have ‘wanted this for so long’ and knows the school shooting ‘is wrong, but I can’t seem to stop myself.
‘I am not well, I am not right. I am a sad person, haunted by those things that do not go away,’ Westman wrote, saying she had recently ‘lost all hope and decided to perform my final action against this world.’
The loss of hope apparently came as Westman started to believe she was dying of lung cancer, which the shooter called a ‘tragic end as it’s entirely self-inflicted.
‘I did this to myself, as I cannot control myself and have been destroying my body through vaping and other means,’ Westman explains, noting that she has ‘felt many pains that make me think I am past the point of recovery.
‘I do not want to recover – I do not want to throw my life away by rotting in a hospital bed. I don’t want the rest of my life to be as a cancer patient, in and out of hospitals, constantly being fretted about with people afraid to be too happy around me.
‘F*** that! I want to go out on my own means,’ the shooter explains.
‘Unfortunately, due to my depression, anger and twisted mind, I want to fulfill a final act that has been in the back of my head for years.’
In much of the rest of the suicide note, Westman tried to apologize to her family and friends as she pleaded with them to move on.
‘I don’t expect forgiveness and I don’t expect an apology,’ the shooter began their letter. ‘I have to hold much weight, but to my family and those close to me, I do apologize for the effects my actions will have on your lives.
‘Please know I care for all of you so much and it pains me to bring this storm of chaos into your lives.’
Westman then told their parents to ‘please move on and continue to give your love to my brothers and sisters and to the rest of the world.
‘Forget my life and the pain I’ve brought,’ Westman asked before making a similar request to her siblings, who she admitted may now want to change their names.
At the end of her letter, Westman pleads with loved ones to ‘find hope, find love and stand up to injustice.’
It was not clear if the shooter was motivated at least by politics, but a gun part she showed off in one of her videos included a message aimed at President Donald Trump – calling for him to be killed.
Other gun parts had the names of other mass shooters scrawled on them.
Officials said in a press conference the shooter was armed with three guns – a rifle, a shotgun and a pistol. All three weapons were fired during the attack, police said.
Minneapolis Police Chief Brian O’Hara said the shooter approached the side of the church and shot through the windows toward the children sitting in the pews.
It is unclear if the shooter fired any of the weapons from inside the church or carried out the entire mass shooting outside before going inside.
Police said at least two of the church doors appeared to have been blocked by two by fours before the shooting, suggesting the gunman wanted to trap the people inside.
‘This was a deliberate act of violence against innocent children and other people worshipping,’ O’Hara said at a news conference.
‘The sheer cruelty and cowardice of firing into a church full of children is absolutely incomprehensible.’
The students at the Catholic grade school had started school on Monday and were attending mass when the shooter stormed the church, which is connected to the school.
It has since emerged that Westman’s mother, Mary, was an employee at the school before she retired in 2021.
Just a few years prior, Mary had signed an application for Robin to have her name changed from Robert, according to court records seen by the Daily Mail.
The petition cost the family $311 and was ultimately approved in January 2020.
It adds that Westman ‘identifies as a female and wants her name to reflect that identification.’
Yet it seemed Westman still struggled with her gender identity, writing at one point that she doesn’t ‘want to dress girly all the time but I guess sometimes I really like it.
‘I know I am not a woman but I definitely don’t feel like a man,’ she wrote, adding: ‘I really like my outfit. I look pretty, smart and modest. I think I want to wear something like this for my shooting.’
Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey denounced transphobia after the revelations about Westman’s identity emerged Wednesday afternoon.
‘I have heard about a whole lot of hate that is being directed at our trans community,’ he said.
‘Anybody who is using this as an opportunity to villainize our trans community or any other community out there has lost their sense of common humanity. We should not be operating out of a place of hate for anyone.’
He added: ‘We should be operating from a place of love. Kids, kids died today. This needs to be about them.’